The other day, I conversed with a friend of mine whom I mentioned in my very first blog post. The discussion was quite dark and filled with emotions that I'd generally shy away from. Him & I, although very different in many respects, share many character traits. We are both pragmatic & put the needs of others ahead of our own; compromise is a tactic we both take seriously and we try our best to be fair. Currently, we are dealing with people who have shared the same oppinion about us:
"you're not the person I thought you were", "I don't think of you the same way I used to", "Things have changed and I don't feel the same way anymore", "Now that I look at us, I feel that this isn't right".
All of these come from setting expectations too soon in the relationship. I always understood this to be dangerous as it sets up that person up for failure. High expectations that are set too soon in a relationship will always come crashing down as we human's tend to be sloppy and lame in our most comfortable state.
For example, the first few months in a new relationship will always seem like heaven. Everything feels perfect & your partner seems like a godsend. When all guards are down & the true character of the person is exposed - all expectations and presumptions about this "perfect" person come crashing down. This may not always be the case, but it certainly is the situation in many crumbling relationships.
The best way to counter this issue is by understanding that the human character is frail & weak. It's vulnerable to imperfections and cannot sustain a glowing review for long period's of time. When you look at the person, you should always expect that you will be impacted by their fallacies and you should endure {if the fallacy is not abusive, destructive, etc.}
I never like to set high expectations, I do realize that human's are chronically imperfect & that chemistry will not always make things harmonious. But what's most important is that issues can be solved with rationale, love & respect dictate the effort put into the outcome, and change is something that should be taken seriously.
I look at my dinner plate, it's not apetizing; but that's fine because it's nourishing.
My job is not challenging anymore, I feel like my skills are under utilized; but that's fine, atleast I'm making money and I'm respected.
My financial situation is rather bleak, so much of my money is spent carelessly; but that's fine, atleast my life is sustained.
My relationship with my wife is rocky and we don't find common ground on pressing issues; but that's fine, we work things out anyway.
My physical health is no where near it's peak, I feel like I can never get a grip on balancing my health; it's alright though, atleast I'm strong & healthy.
Sometimes it seems that I'm missing half of my brain, my memory is hazey at best, and I don't function at the speed I need to; not a big issue, I can still process complex ideas.
My mother is growing heavily dependant on me, I don't know if I have the patience and tollerance to maintain this complicated relationship; it's all good though, atleast we love each other and things will work out.
Spiritually, I'm far behind my peak. Knowledge and inner peace is what I was known for, now I feel like my thoughts and feelings wander off into foolish pleasures; but that's alright, what was once lost, can be reclaimed with forgiveness.
My relationship with my father is at a stalemate. We've mutually acknowledged we're not as close as we use to be, and it's consistently growing distant; relationships change & sometimes, distance makes the heart grow fonder.
I have no degree of self discipline; it's a constant struggle, there's always room for improvement, even as you inch nearer to death.
So many of my dreams & ambitions are not materializing due to my poor life management skills, I'm tired of my lack-lusture behaviour; don't worry, at some point, they'll flourish when they're meant to.
I'm worried about my future, I don't want to live vicariously in the sins of my forefathers; don't worry, you are in God's care.
Al Hamdulilah {praise & thanks to the Almighty} I'm satisfied.
For without doubt, with the rememberance of Allah, do hearts find satisfaction. (Quran, 13:28)
I sat with an elderly woman one evening as she narrated a story that seared through me. She was a rather calm woman, but radiated an energy that spoke of a past laden with wisdom. She was dressed in a very simple black gown and a white scarf flowed over her hair. Her stare would drive through the staunches of men while plaguing anyone with a sense of fear; but it was a fear that drew you near with curiousity.
I listened closely and she began,
"A man was making his sacred pilgrimage to the afterlife - he was dressed in a white shroud and lowered slowly into the earth while his loved ones starred. He was well aware of what was happening and witnessed everyone's unique actions. Some cried, others starred into the distance, several wailed and many breathed deeply. He was a man that was well respected and evoked the emotions of all those he touched.
He clenched tightly with him a book of history. It appeared to be a source of comfort as he lay lifeless in earth that grew tighter with every passing moment. He was then approached by a group of strange looking beings; looked similar to humans but their race & gender could not be distinguished. They asked him a number of questions and each one he answered in the affirmative.
Then passed years and events that struck degrees of peace and anxiety and within a matter of moments, he stood alone in a place that dumbfounded him. It wasn't bound by the elements, and time was not an issue. He clenched that book of history with his dear life and was soon approached by a few men cloaked in gowns made from something other than cloth. It appeared that they were entirely enshrouded in a pleasant warm light. They looked at him and said,
"What's that you have clenched so tightly?"
He said, "it's a book I was given as I was breathing my last"
The 2 men looked at him, smiled and said, "a story perhaps? We are not bound by time anymore, would you mind reading it to us?"
He than realized that it was the day he heard so much about. The day that many people thought was just an old myth. He now realized this was a day that was the definition of reality; it was his judgment.
He started to ease his grip on the book and looked at the front cover; it was bound by brown leather and had no title - but his name was inscribed in tiny gold letters at the bottom right hand corner. He opened it began to read as the 2 men listened carefully to every detail. He spoke of all things beautiful, embarrassing, deceitful, painful, treacherous, glorious, difficult, comical, shameful, enlightening, fearful, and finally anxiety stricken.
He closed the book and the two men stood up and uttered a plea to their Master,
"We seek to intercede on behalf of this believer. We ask, in all humility, to forgive him of his transgressions and show him your highest degree of mercy. He toiled and slaved without asking for any reward. We request that you overlook his shortcomings and give him the pleasure of your nearness. His words and actions matured with his years until they eventually reached harmony. His sins are a plenty - but his good deeds reached the hearts of many and he has sown the seeds of belief in the land that flourished even after he journeyed to the afterlife. Dear Master, do you accept?"
At this point, the elderly woman stopped narrating the story and looked towards me and said,
"do you see the value of this story?"
"What is it?" I uttered.
"Nothing goes to the grave with you, except your story. Your history, your deeds, words, actions and intentions are the only possessions worthy of your toil. Journey to the afterlife with that book clenched tightly, because your story will be your only asset."
Thank you for reminding me of my humanity, Much gratitude for the blessed wisdom aged with humility, Vulnerable is what you are, Reduced to my knees is what I've become, My heart fills my body with serenity and extacy, I beg for freedom from bliss, knowing, knowing, oh dear Lord, such bitter knowledge Bliss that will never manifest and reduced to emotionless memory - destined to fade into nothingness From the guiding light of heaven, my heart begs the question - what ever have I done to be given the taste of bliss - knowing I'll never drown in its extasy. For the sake of perspective, my mind recieved inspiration as such Grateful am I - for life is grand.
Running is incredibly boring for the average person. Taking strides, street after street can be very unstimulating for some. Then there are people who appreciate the freedom of long distance running. It's your time to get a lot of thinking done while you train yourself to run longer and harder. It's the hour of freedom from the world as you zero in on your body; your brain chanting and motivating you to run harder and to never quit.
Us runners are aware of something, it's called the wall. It's the point of complete physical exhaustion. You try to run & your body refuses to move. Your mind's prowess cannot overcome the intimidating wall & you essentially give up. Some people carry on walking, other try to run & it's usually embarrassing.
However, in the midst of all your exhaustion and pain as you try to move past the wall - it suddenly shatters under its own weight & heroically, you blast off as if you were at the peak of your endurance. This is the golden moment for us runners - where our minds have given up - our bodies have haulted & in a short second - you've igniting and taken off like a wolf.
As you're aware, this is all metaphor for my topic of discussion: it is, "surpassing your limitations" - I will write more tomorrow as for now, I'm exhausted.
I consult a man that has comforted me when the dark hour of the night brought out my vulnerability; His name is Zain ul Abedeen [peace be upon him].
My relationship with him started 6 years ago when I searched high & low for solace. I was the luckiest man alive to come across a man who was named "the crowning prince of the worshippers". When I met him, I realized not who he was, although I could tell his soul beamed so brightly - a light so bright - that it shook you at the very core.
He didn't speak much, he was quiet man and only spoke through paper. I asked him questions & he stood there and handed me a book. I looked at it's glittering red cover and gold lettering which stated "as sahafa as sajiddiya".
"hmmm....the psalms of the prostrating", I muttered.
The book was written for those who took comfort in praying and supplicating while their heads touched the ground. I guess he knew I was one of them, I deeply respected the institution of prostration; my hero's advocated it.
I opened the book and there it was....a simple supplication for the person who understands they are not alone in the decision making process.
Zain Al Abedeen [peace be upon him] read the supplication to me and I followed shortly after him - I admired him and was so compelled by his sweet & strong nature that I wanted to abandon my life and become his servant.
I sat down and read the supplication where it stated mans need for help and protection. It went deep into me and showed me that I was never independent in my deicision making - that I needed Allah to decide what to do when I come to a cross roads. Allah, the master of my micro universe, guides my decisions so I may follow through with the best case scenario for myself & those whom I affiliate with.
This is why I stand by my decisions - this is why, whenever I have nightly conversations with Shaytan, I remind him that it was not just me who decided to live the way I do now, it is my Master - Allah, that hath put me here. I am honoured with what I've been commanded to do and I take pride in the situations I am put in.
Indepence is a bullsh*t term, it was coined to fool people that they were the centre of the universe & all revolves around them. We are dependent upon each other and inevitably dependent upon the One.
Thank you Zain ul Abedeen for giving me a bridge to cross into Allah's kingdom.
Living vicariously, or having others live vicariously through you is dangerous. The lifestyle I'm talking about is when you are fulfilling the duties and commitments of those who've stepped out of the picture because they couldn't bare the sitation they were in. The nature of your situation "volun-told"you to absorb the struggle of others.
I've been doing this for quite some time, and only recently has Shaytan conversed with me about it. He [or maybe she] tried to convince me that I don't have to live like this anymore. Only recently, has my friendly enemy sat me down in the midst of night, explaning to me that I need to do what is in my best....selfish interests.
What he explain sounded near logical. Like most humans, you do what is in your interests - you do what is best for you and you decide what you need for yourself. I did something about 3 years ago - I somehow convinced myself that selfless living, is the only way to live. I've managed to turn a lifestyle of selfless service into a selfish passion.
Some might commend a person whose taken on such a role. I questioned the philosophy, thinking I might have put a spell on myself.
Shaytan kept talking - he continued siting next me at the edge of my bed as he offered me a sense of cold contentment. He had me in an intellectual lockdown, I believed him. I thought....just for a moment - even the spiritual master spends time to focus on what is in his selfish interests.
I looked up at Shaytan and asked him,
"If selfless living is an unfulfilling way to live - than why has it bore so many grandoise achievements?"
He then said to me,
"Are you telling me, that you the emptiness inside you is an achievement?"
I paused to quell the frustration and rebutted,
"what champion hasn't been through struggle before he became the master of what God placed in front of him?"
Shaytan stayed quiet, he got up and straightened his suitjacket and walked away. But he left his impression on me. He offered me the chance to decide selfishly for once in my life....I then questioned, was it him or I who offered that proposal?
I just know that I need a little more energy to fulfill my duties as the man I want to be; however, for the time being - I'm in need of a break.
Sometimes, they're a result of poor judgement, other times they're due to mindless laziness & other times, due to being naiive.
My social circle is rather large & therefore, I don't have many intimate [close] friends other than the members of my family. Therefore, I SOMETIMES consult them on matters - but due to my stubborn [Obsessive need to complete a task I started] nature, I take my own route. My parents lay claim that I was like that since childhood; I take advice, and do whatever I rationalize. Like other humans, my rationale isn't always sound, - I'm usually driven by the utilitarian thought process, which is the need to consider "the greater good" & other times, I'm driven by impulse.
The other day, I failed to make a quick move; a move that would be considered logical to most people, but to my lazy & somewhat naiive nature - it wasn't something that crossed my mind. I got some heat for it and rightly so. But, I learned my lesson - one that I wont forget & I'm glad I went through it.
I took a hard look into my life and like most men, I tried to focus the blame on someone else; I realized that was stupid and I reassessed the reason why I'm not the manly, alpha [fu*king] male most people want me to be.
I spoke to my mother about my personal dissapointment and told her,
"Mama, I'm not content with the way I am. I don't like the way I make decisions and feel that I'm not as mature as I need to be."
She spoke to me, as if she knew I was trying to blame her and she was graceful. She didn't respond the way I wanted her to, she said,
"whatever happens, just be grateful and content"
As usual, that brought back a sense of self-satisfaction knowing that, I am who I am and I should be content with that.
But, by inheriting from my father an extreme/overt sense of self-criticism - I couldnt help by feel bothered. In the midst of that insanity I made 1 rational theory: It's just the nature of the situation.
I thought - the situation that I'm currently in is the best-case scenario. Out of all the situations that I could have been, this was the better one. The nature of the situation, nurtured me. No situation will garner what I consider to be the best case scenario; however, it is what I need. I felt relieved and I sincerely appologized to my mother for my lack of gratitude and as most mothers, she accepted.
I think overt self-criticism will be the death of me if I don't stop.
The other day, I starred deeply into the eyes of the ones I love most. I looked closely at the hearts of the ones that raised me. I starred long and hard, like my life depended on it.
All I saw was the frail soul that hid deeply in the hearts of bani Adam.
I was scared, thinking - maybe it was I that encouraged their souls to feel fragile and vulnerable. Blamed myself for not fulfilling my duties as a son.
I starred deeply into the eyes of my sweet sister, the mother of 2 angels, the wife of a pensive man and saw the same.
Vulnerability...
I saw humans who desired protection and wished for ease. I saw humanity's wish for peace and serenity. All I saw was a masked sadness - however, the masked was crumbling, it was made of a material weaker than that of flesh.
The eyes spoke to me, and its silent words sent me into the depth of the coldest waters. I wished for the water to engulf me and send me beyond the borders of this planet of masked and broken souls.
But I realized, I was the water.
I realized - looking deeply into the eyes of my new friend - the young woman who wished for love and confidence - that it was I, starring at myself in the reflection of her glossy eyes. The gloss of sweet tears that covered over the gentle grey colour. The rare colour that a select few are blessed with.
I wished for a will made of steel, I wished and prayed hard - to be a human not bound by the shakles of vulnerability. But I couldn't break free - I will never.
It is my nature, to forever be vulnerable - it is the will of my heart to remain frail.
The quiver of my character that stands tall in the face all those that wish to be like me. It qivered like a leaf...I quiver because I know that in the face of my Lord - I'm just a weak man, aching for a life free of hardship..
But that ship doesnt sail with the wind - it charges at me without mercy.
My only defense is to admit - I am a human, vulnerable and frail; slightly worn and damaged prematurely. At that point, is where I realize without my Creator, I'm just another pound of flesh about to be trampled by the charging ship.
Instead, I ride the ship like an Angel that enshrouds the sky with stunning light.
and I ensure that it is I that uses life, and not life that uses me.
The animal known as the human is born frail and in need of protection - and lives in that state. We just mask it, some do a better job than others.
My job is to take the mask off and embrace it and wish for the protection of my Creator, the one and only Allah.
blessed be my soul - frail and weak, may it forever realize my need for protection.
I realize that many humans fail to grasp the big picture. We fail to choose long term goals and instead, focus on satisfying impulse. We choose irrational emotional reactions and fail to reflect before we act.
Not to say that emotional reactions are bad - but treat your emotions with value and express them only when you see the situation worthy of your emotions.
I'm tired of the weak spirited human. The one that choose the glitter of planet earth and neglects the reality of selfless humanism.
The trained human has tamed their soul; a taming that suffocates ill reaction to simple and pointless, words and deeds. The tamed human assess and thinks before moving forward.
The brain is such a beautiful thing; it is the universe that begs to be discovered, it's thoughts and memories are endless and the vast depths you can travel within are sometimes frightening.
Your vessel to travel the mental-universe is your heart - the only thing that could protect your soul from the darkness that sometimes lurks in the vast darkness of the mind.
However, why would someone refrain from using their minds? why are people much more willing to submit to impulse and irrational behaviour? I never understood.
Logic is a beautiful thing, it is my passport to sanity in the psychotic jungle known as society.
I'd rather be a poor man with a mind that could conquer ignorance, than a wealthy man whose will submits to impulse.
To watch something unfold before your very eyes? Something that seems so subtle, so natural and profoundly sacred.
To witness it unfold and bloom without the intervention of humanity. From the bulb - out comes a portrait - one sculpted by the potent phrase "be"...and it became.
Such a portrait is worthy to be seen only by the patient. For the inpatient cannot bare to watch something take its time and unfold slowly.
The inpatient must see it immediately - so much to the extent that they cannot bare the idea that something hessitates and prepares for its exposure to planet earth.
The inpatient one thrashes at the bulb, some open it gently. Regardless, they failed to give the bulb the need to open up naturally.
The bulb dies - only to unveil that the hidden portrait within was too beautiful for the world. and perished quickly
Some care not.
cursed for life are the inpatient - lost for life are the careless.
Dear Readers, As humans, we are obligated to make decisions that are in the best interests of ourselves, and those near and dear in our lives. The decision making process is a tedious one, as we're require to assess the potential outcome. This requires foresight, hindsight and the willingness to accept responsibility if the outcome causes harm, and if good comes from it - to accept it with humility and gratefulness.
We're obliged to weigh the pro's and con's and if the good outweighs the bad - it is in our best interests to follow through.
Much of what I stated above is structured risk taking.
It's pensive intimate discourse. Sometimes it requires "old man" behaviour [sitting around in the quiet focusing on the task at hand] and we usually pair this with seeking advise from those who've made similar decisions.
Sometimes - we just say "f' it" and just do it without the pensive, structured risk taking. This is the risk taking of adrenaline junkies who appreciate the golden feeling of great memories and aged wisdom.
The kind of wisdom we love hearing about. These lessons are the kind that we cannot prepare for. Your only means to gaining from such risks is to supplicate, have confidence and faith.
As a human being, I appreciate the adrenaline rush of a risk. I despise the phrase "what if I did..."
I need to see something through, right till the end. and so should you.
Sometimes the need to take the risk and see it right until the end comes from two needs. The need to satisfy curiousity and there's this magnetic need to find out. This is usually a byproduct of contradicting thoughts & emotions, some that are generated by the mind & heart and they are at odds.
and the other is a byproduct of "harmony of mind and heart".
Harmony of mind and heart is the weapon of the spiritual warrior. If you ever are in a state where your emotions and rationale are on par with each other - don't waste it.
This is the highest form of confidence - one in which, your capacity to make something work is at its highest and the anxiety of risk isn't there. You may see a potential risk - but it does not hinder your performance.
This is the equivalent of making your soul a freight train.
I am not tired, nor am I lazy. I am not unjust, nor am I blind. my anger is not a result of instinct. it is a result of rationale.
I rationalized, thought about and realized that if I wasn't angry about the death of the innocent, I would be well adjusted to a f*cked up society. A society that is ill-prinicpled and self-absorbed and cares only for their wealth.
I am not adjusted to a f*cked up society, I am it's polar opposite; staring at it; studying it's every move; and preparing to enlighten it.
Shedding light on the moral ills of modern humanity, or lack there of. Telling people they need to be angry, they need to utilize the one gift of sheer rage - at the only thing worthy of anger - oppression.
Politicians staying quiet, politicians working strictly for votes bending backwards for a ballot that will probably score them some points for a short period of time, but eventually that paper ballot is what will choke them when the scent of children's blood doesn't leave their hands.
I am angry, rightfully and for the sake of what is just.
One of these days, my anger will manifest - and you will be angry like me.
Complete sense of helplessness unable to do anything All I can do is protest and blog possibly donate some money
I become angry - but my anger is suffocated
I will never forgive an oppressor, nor will I forgive I witness hell on television the hell of mangled children the hell of civilians convulsing from shock and pain but the hell to be experienced by the politicians who've remained silent is far worse
soon enough, they'll rot soon enough their throne and wealth will be the kindle that fuels their fire
Why is it that every government is tippy-toeing in the tulips for the oppressor Why did Harper's government react spinelessly? Why is Obama silent? Why hasn't the revolutionary president done anything Why is he on vacation as the world burns? Just another bourgeoisie reaping the wealth of the poor and innocecnt
In due time, the oppressor will beg for mercy and no one will answer their call Soon enough the silent leaders will claim innocence, and no one will be there to hear them
When that happens, I will hope that my prayers for the oppressed and my dollars might keep me away from the kingdom of hell the oppressor built for himself.
How many people have I heard cry their souls out in the beginning of the Muharram. People crying hard and lamenting - yes, both MEN and WOMEN crying hard in a public setting. Crying hard for the genocide in the scorching deserts of Kerbala, Iraq 1400 years ago.
My Leader and Example, my role model and saint, Hussain (peace be upon him) - the grandson of the last messenger and prophet of God, stood his ground against a regiem and tyrant that still continues to kill today.
Most people don't appreciate the intensity of this tragedy, both Muslims and Non-Muslims alike, most Muslims tell me "why are you crying over a death that occured 1400 years ago, get over with it and move on"
Non-Muslims, especially ones living in peaceful countries - never having to fear a dictator, or muderous opressor, don't see the point of commemorating, celebrating or mourning the death of someone who actually stood up and died on his feet, compared to most leaders who'd rather live on their knees.
I'm sure my readers still don't really grasp the necessity to remember the message of Imam Hussain(p.b.u.h), but when you see children dying in Ghaza and people burnt to death in a suicide bombing in Iraq, and Kenyan's running for their lives, and Congalese in threat of another civil war, than maybe you would appreciate the story of a man who stood up, when everyone else sat down.
Especially when that man was one of the most beloved of the Prophet Muhammad (pbuh), more than any other companion who some dance around for in circles for when they hear their name. More than any other scholar who spent their life trying to propogate their perspective on islamic law. His message was as potent as Muhammad's because it WAS Muhammad's message: Justice in the face of Tyranny, self sacrific, never remaining silent who injustice occurs, action, action, action.
Don't just shed tears, don't just sit and wallow, don't just watch the news and get angry. Get up. Struggle and sacrifice, spend money on the needy, teach people about the need to bark at their government's when they've stayed silent on genocides. Teach the young to be active in their communities and be just in the treatment of others. Teach people that humanitarianism is the greatest act of worship.
Maybe once in our lives, our tears and anger will actually turn into action, maybe once in our lives, our butts can get off their floor, and actually uphold the message of the most incredible leader- Hussain (a.s) whose spirit still lives on.
If I cry this year, it'll be because I'm witnessing my students cry. If I cry this year, it'll be because I'm angry, not sad or shocked at the opression of Imam Hussain (a.s) and his family - I will be angry and cry at the fact, that his message will go to waste without our change in direction and using this religion for the benifit of humanity.
Our community was just hit by a locomotive. We heard it coming and some of us tried hard to prepare, and others chose not to.
But now we’ve stood up and we’re shocked with the most intense awakening; the murder of one of our own.
A young man who is my brother, although I didn’t know him. A man who is your son, and is related to you by spirit.
He was a man, a brother of our village…
We all left our villages, our parents’ villages in Lebanon and Iraq and migrated to the village of Al-Huda.
The next time someone asks me what Di’a I’m from, I will say Al-Huda.
My closeness and bonds to you, my fellow villagers, is closer to any bond or any village in Lebanon.
Al Huda is our Die’a, Al-Huda is the village of our children, our children’s children and so on.
We may fantasize about flocking back, but reality stares us in the face and says we are here and our challenges are here, our bonds are here and we have an obligation to protect each other – us – ahlul-dieat Al-Huda. This Die’a is our turba, my flesh is of this die’a and so is all of yours.
It take an entire village to raise a child, we are all responsible for each other.
When one child is hurt or is being seduced by shaytan, it is up to us, the Ahlul die’a to step in and show the child mercy. The same rahma that Nabi-Mohammad (s.a.w.a) showed to his fello members of Medina.
The small, new community of Muslims who faced challenges, like we do, who starred shaytan in the face and realized, if they didn’t take ownership of their new home, shaytan would devour their community.
We need to stick together and bond upon the principles of mercy and patience.
We need to honestly and sincerely bond with each other with intensions cleaner and purer than the ones we current hold.
We need to keep our hearts open and realize the vivid reality which we live in.
The reality known as Akhir ul Zaman, - the end times – the period of human history that is most difficult.
The only way we can succeed is if we take genuine ownership of this die’a and realize that it is home, the village we belong to.
Our children, our young men and women, our brothers and sisters, our young souls nad hearts are also our students who see and learn more from us than we intend to teach – they see us for who we are and want to look up to us.
If we don’t re-adjust the way we think about each other, if we don’t re-approach the way we look at die’at – Al Huda, we will onl witness more tragedies.
An example – this was told to a crowd of about 10,000 muslims at a conference 2 years ago by Imam Abdul Hakim Quick
He said, in South Africa, the drug problem is enormous, all drugs from east – to – west pass through Africa.
Drug usage, esp. methamphetamine, became prominent amongst Muslims.
To the point where young women and the daughters of the community were selling their virginity to pay their debts to dealers and drug lords.
Fitna is vividly everywhere.
But the fathers, mothers, brothers and sisters, aunts and uncles, friends and all did not accuse their own of sin and stop going to their mosques for fear of embarrassment, they didn’t see shame.
They rallied together, they organized, and they became a source of support for each others and their youth and took to the streets as one voice, one heart and one people.
They challenged the dealers; they challenged the drug lords, the corrupt cops and politicians, and as a community, stood up for their youth at a time when most Muslim communities would accuse them of sin.
The underlying principle of what I’m trying to say is “Rahma”; Mercy should be the governing point, the pivot, the centre, and the underlying principle of how we deal with our brothers, our sisters, and all those who are members of this die’a.
Therefore we need to change something within us, we need rebirth.
What we need is Allah, and none will change our condition except Allah.
And if we turn to Al Quran al majeed – Surat Al ra’ad, verse 11
eng trans: For each person there are angels in succession, before and behind them. They guard him by the command of Allah.
Verily, never will Allah change the condition of a people until they change themselves. But when Allah willeth a people’s punishment, they can be no luring it back, nor will they, besides him, anyone to protect.
So in order for us to work in harmony, to change our condition, we need to change ourselves, our children and the future of die’at A- Huda and the ummah depends on it.
Because it takes a village to raise a child, it takes a die’a to raise a child.
Rally together with merciful intensions to protect each other from Shaytan
Im going to visit my father and talk to him, I will be as proper and patient as possible, hoping he will open up to the idea. Maybe I'm being unrealistic, but it's a route I need to go, it is unfair for her to have her parents involved from the get go and Myself, unable to figure out how I will get my parents to be accepting of the idea. I know myself, if in my mind, all I can think about is the displeasure of my parents, I won't be able to be myself with her. They are wrong to ever think in the wavelength they do and I would be a fool to submit to anyone's ignorance, but unfortunately ignorance is something I have to overcome before I get involved with a woman as golden as her. I'll give you an example, when I mentioned the idea to my mother, in the midst of her negative feedback, she said "this is not what WE want". I then asked her, what does she mean by "we" she said..."me and you". She's of the oppinion that this is her decision as much as it is mine. And with all due honesty, I feel Ive come to a new chapter in my life. I've allowed myself to roll over and let their oppinions in important matters superseed mine even if I knew they're wrong. I started submitting out of exhaustion from argument and fighting. I also submitted and make-believe they were right just so I could avoid a fight and further put dents and holes in an already complicated relationship. I am thankful and full of praise to Allah for the parents I was born to, they teach me so much, but by virtue of their upbringing and lack of religious education, I have to battle uphill for nearly every opponion I express to my father, and many things to my mother. I was once independent in my arguments and opponions, and was honoured by my ability to rationalize situations alone, but I've become so tired and hopeless in my dialouge with them, if my father were to tell me it's halal to walk nude, I would agree with belief. As of today I will never let that happen again. I need to find energy, somewhere to battle their Sherman tank-like stubborness without comming out angry, depressed, etc. I gotta lay down my sword and see if there is any other tool to wage my spiritual struggle with. As for her, I will retreat for a few days to strategize. Think things through and find my way.
The other day, I conversed with a friend of mine whom I mentioned in my very first blog post. The discussion was quite dark and filled with emotions that I'd generally shy away from. Him & I, although very different in many respects, share many character traits. We are both pragmatic & put the needs of others ahead of our own; compromise is a tactic we both take seriously and we try our best to be fair. Currently, we are dealing with people who have shared the same oppinion about us:
I make errors.
